Last week, the world lost one of America’s most celebrated directors: Mike Nichols. Known for film classics such as Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf? as well as The Graduate, Silkwood, Heartburn, Postcards from the Edge, and more recent flicks Closer and Charlie Wilson’s War, Nichols will be sorely missed by the film community.
Nichols passed away unexpectedly from a heart attack on November 19th. He leaves behind a son, two daughters and his wife of 26 years, ABC News anchor Diane Sawyer. He was 83.
Although no one expects Sawyer to begin dating any time soon, if ever, Nichols’ death begs the question of what widows should do after their husbands pass away. Is there any good dating advice for women who have lost their husbands?
Is it acceptable for widows to date?
Losing a husband might very well be one of the most painful and heartbreaking experiences a woman can ever endure. It can feel like the world has ended, and for many women, that is close to the truth. Slowly, however, the pieces do go back together and there might come a time when a woman is interested in dating again. Is this acceptable?
Getting back into the dating world after losing a husband is not an easy transition to make. In an effort to offer some dating advice for women who have experienced this loss, here are some tips on making dating a healthy decision:
- Make sure you’ve healed. Although there might always be a void after the loss of a husband, it is important to make sure you’ve become complete and whole before dating. You cannot have a healthy relationship unless you are healthy. This might take time and that is perfectly acceptable.
- Know that the early relationships are probably just transitions. The loss of a spouse will result in loneliness. While some widows meet someone and spend the rest of their lives with that person, often the first few relationships are transitions that are meant to help you heal. Don’t expect anything more or be too hasty.
- Follow your own rules. There’s no right or wrong way to get back into dating when you’ve lost your husband. You’ll find plenty of advice columns and therapists with different theories, but what it really comes down to is figuring out what is right for you.
- Don’t rush into anything. If you’re not ready to date for five years, that’s fine. If you want to date six months later, that’s okay. You will know when you are ready to date. It might be scary and a little sad at first, but you’ll feel it.
Many widows tend to forget that their husband died, but they themselves did not. They still have a life to live and the right to be happy. Have you lost your husband? Have you begun dating? How long did it take you to get back into the game?