Marriage is tough – the divorce rate in most western countries is enough to confirm that. But why is that some couples seem to make it even through the toughest of times? Why is it that they are able to endure? Bill and Hillary Clinton are a great example of this. It could be said that after Bill’s infidelity Hillary stayed with him for political reasons, but couldn’t she have become even more successful had she left him? For many couples, infidelity is usually the end of the union. It doesn’t have to be; if you ask yourself the most important questions for married couples you will see that it is more important to remain married than to part ways.
So what are the important questions that you should be asking?
Although every marriage is unique, there are some universally important questions that every married person should ask themselves.
•Can I be a better husband or wife? This is an important question because in most troubled marriages, people don’t examine their roles. You need to look at yourself critically and see whether you can do a better job of being either a wife or a husband before you criticize your spouse. If you both awoke each morning with the commitment to get better and better at your marriage each day you would have a stronger relationship.
•If there was something about myself I would change to improve our marriage what would it be? Nobody is perfect but we can all make changes in our behavior and personality in order to improve our marriages. You need to look at yourself critically and ask yourself what about you your partner might not like so much and then work on changing it.
•How can I communicate better about financial problems? Most people get divorced because of the way they communicate about money. If you could change the way you approach your husband or your wife when you want to talk about money, do you think it would improve your marriage?
•In what ways have I changed since we got married that are not helping? We are evolving creatures and it is only natural that we change. That said, we don’t have to change for the worse; we need to strive to change for the better. Critically look at yourself now and compare it to how you were at the beginning of your marriage. Are you still as affectionate? Do you strive to do nice things for your spouse like you did back in the day? Do you still make an effort to look your most attractive? As we grow more comfortable in a marriage we tend to become complacent; that is just not right for a healthy relationship.
•Lastly, you must ask yourself what you know about your spouse’s real feelings about your marriage. Don’t just take it for granted that they are happy about everything. They may be happy about some aspects but unhappy about others and you need to know what they are so that you can work on improving things.
Do you think asking yourself these questions for married couples gives your relationship a chance?[contact-form-7 404 "Not Found"]