Can you pass the love test for in-laws at Hanukkah?
Yesterday marked the start of Hanukkah, and millions of Jews across the globe will begin celebrating the holiday, which is also known as the “Festival of Lights.” For eight nights, loved ones will gather to light the menorah, say blessings, and exchange gifts.
Hanukkah, like any other holiday, is a time for friends and family. If you’re married, “family” means your in-laws. The Jewish mother-in-law is one of the most notorious headaches married couples can have!
Although it is important to understand the meaning of Hanukkah, it might be absolutely critical for the survival of your marriage to figure out how to pass the “in-laws at Hanukkah” love test!
The holiday season fills many married couples with dread and sometimes even sparks arguments. Crucial questions come up such as, “Whose house are you going to for the first night of Hanukkah?” “Will your parents be coming here for the whole week?” “Why do I have to make your mother’s latke recipe?”
Thankfully, we’ve got some tips to ensure that you and your spouse pass the love test during the Hanukkah season. Read on if you want to survive!
Challenge #1: The in-laws with no boundaries
Unless your in-laws live very far away, there is a chance they could show up unannounced from time to time. If this is a rare thing, you might be able to deal with it. The problems start when it happens frequently. Beat this challenge by acknowledging the good while asking for what you need. For example, “We love spending time with you, but our schedule is pretty packed. Let’s set a date!”
Challenge #2: The “TMI” in-laws
No one wants to be subjected to TMI, which means “too much information”. Unfortunately, however, many in-laws fall into this category. Whether they’re sharing intimate details about themselves or your spouse, enough is enough! You might not be able to change this behavior, but you can use humor to deflect it. The next time your mother-in-law brings up her incontinence, say, “Here we go again” or change the subject.
Challenge #3: The needy in-laws
Overly sensitive people tend to be clingy, and it’s the worst when this describes your in-laws! Don’t take it personally when they want to know when you’ll be taking a vacation with them because you just took a trip with your own parents. Acknowledge their feelings but try not to give into the perceived slight; it will only fuel the fire.
Lots of people get along swimmingly with their in-laws, or so we hear. In fact, have you ever?