I am Kate, 26 years old living in Detroit, Michigan. I have been in several relationships so far and I find that there is always something missing. My previous boyfriends were kind and caring, but I feel like I need more. I need a soulmate; someone I can have the true connection with and I do not know what to do about it. My friends have got me books regarding relationships and tried taking me to parties. But, I don’t think that will help me. I need an effective answer to the question, “How to find your soulmate?”
Where do I start?
First, try socializing a lot. Just get out of your sweat pants and get some fresh air. You can’t meet you soulmate sitting at home, can you? If you have a boring job, then you only meet boring people. Get a new job, an interesting one if you can, which boosts your spirits. Make new friends and share your ideas and views with them. Do something adventurous like skiing or hiking. You will get a chance to meet someone with your similar interests. Friendship is always a better option to start any relationship because you will know a lot about each other and you both will have mutual friends already. You get to see the fun side your guy.
Sometimes, I don’t feel very confident about going out. What do I do?
To be loved, you have to love yourself. You are in a bad phase if you are constantly feeling bad. You have to learn to handle the emotional stress. Stress eating does no good for your looks. Read some books on self helping techniques, you can even try a shot in yoga. That will help clear your mind and optimizes you. You have to pamper yourself, if those late night hogging have left your muscles flabby, then join a gym and work out. And for the body, go to a spa and get a full body massage. Get a bikini wax; come on, who does not like sexy legs. Get your girlfriends, hit a dance club and dance it all out. Make sure you are dressed in noticeable brands, it won’t go unnoticed. Yes, these could be the answers to the question, “How to find my soulmate?”
Does looks alone matter?
Not really, you have to be the kind of person you are trying to find. Try to be a wonderful human being, explore yourself. Do the things that you have always wanted to but thought you didn’t have the time. Be prepared to handle any situation. Relationships have ups and downs: there is always one person loving more than the other person. But it is based on the situations; one can be a fierce lover when they are mentally strong.
Should I learn to think like him too?
Be yourself, in the process of searching your other half, you need not lose yourself. Thinking alike will give you a lot to talk about but there will be differences and understanding it matters too. Spend time learning each other’s point of views. It need not be argumentative, you don’t have to prove that you are right and he is wrong. You have to express what you feel about the matter. But you can learn to like what he likes, if he likes soccer a lot and you don’t know how to play, and then you learn from him. It will mean a lot to him as you are trying to make him happy. You can also suggest that he learn cooking your favorite dishes and you can volunteer for teaching him. You grow with this person: you learn new things for him as he does for you. You explore each other and you need not change everything about you to impress him.
But I really believe there is someone waiting for me but it is exhausting. Should I give up?
You have to trust your beliefs to make it happen. You have waited this long, be patient to give yourself the life you want. Finding your soulmate is different; you connect with them unlike everyone else and you realize why it did not work out with anyone else. Do not settle for anything less in a hurry and rush things up. These courses take time but it’s worth it, right?